The Search is Over but the Journey has Just begun

I know you guys are all in suspense to know what my Big Exciting Surprise is!!

Okay Okay, I'll Tell You!

I found my biological family!!!!!!

So here's how it all went down!! Well, the quick version! Maybe not so quick! Its a lot!

Monday morning James woke me up super early to tell me that my Ancestry DNA test results had posted and I had a close 1st-2nd cousin match. Fortunately for us, he had a very established family tree and we shared some additional common matches. Then we compared the first match to our shared matches and found our common ancestor. Next we took our big white board and drew out the family tree starting with the common ancestor, then her children followed by each of their children and children's children. We scoured the internet and obituaries to find families and names who were missing from the family tree. Using my non-identifying information that had my birth families age when I was born, we were able to figure out their birth years. We used those birth years and some other information to match with family tree we had built. After 12 hours, we were pretty sure we knew who my Biological Dad was and we found him on Facebook. I sent him a message almost immediately. Around 2am Tuesday morning, James woke me up to tell me he was pretty sure he had found my bio-sister and bio-Mom after he searched through Bio-Dads page. So the next morning at 8am I sent Bio-Mom a message.......And she responded immediately! She was very surprised and happy and excited. I believe she called my bio-sister who also called another bio-sister. 
By the end of Tuesday, I had messaged with bio-mom, and 2 bio-sisters as well as received Facebook friends requests from 2 bio-half brothers and other long time friends of my bio family.
Needless to say, I was very warmly welcomed!
Tonight I met with my Bio-Mom Kathleen, and Bio-Sisters Jessica and Erin. I want to do a whole other post on that meeting but I will tell you that I had a great great time!

Thank you for everyone who has prayed for this to happen, Thanks to my family for standing with me and encouraging me. Mostly thanks to my Husband for encouraging me to continue this journey when it seemed hopeless for so long.

Here are some pictures to hold you over until tomorrow. I have baby pictures!!!!

Choose Joy

Wow!
I can't believe it's been 3 years since I've written a blog post!

I've had many blog posts that I've started, not finished, and eventually erased. If you are reading this, than this post is different!

So what's Different? Me!

Recently the kids and I started going to a new church! We hunted for months and months, from church to church until we finally stumbled upon Eleven22. The kids Love their classes and I love the lessons they are learning. Even more importantly though, I'm learning and growing.
The Sermons are grounded in scripture, and I'm not talking one scripture at the beginning followed by 45 minutes of Inspirational mumbo. Pastor Joby does an amazingly passionate job of teaching the truths of the Bible, throwing in a little humor, while reminding us of the undeserving gift of redemption through Jesus Christ.

Choose Life:
For a Long time I have struggled with my Christian walk, but more than that, I've struggled with depression. Having been abandoned by my birth family as a Toddler has made me struggle with questions of self worth. As a Child I was abused over a long period of time by a trusted Adult and I never knew how to tell anyone. Carrying around a secret like that was heavy, and difficult. I learned to fake happiness on the outside while feeling alone and broken on the inside. Everyday was a battle to Choose Life... Yes, as a preteen I thought about suicide... Yes I sat on the edge of my parents bed with a 38 Special Revolver in my hands, thinking of how easy it would be to end the pain, but God was with me in those moments, in all the moments. He was there when I came into this world, a 2lb preemie with the odds against me. He was there the day my Biological Family decided someone else could raise me better. Even more, he was there during the abuse. He was the safe place I went to escape, the calm during my storm. Most important of all, he was the whisper in my head, in my heart, telling me there was something greater than my pain and my depression. That there was a reason to live.

Choose Joy:
As time went on, I looked to myself to make me happy. After-all, I knew what was best for Me. I've still gone to Church, and always a "Christian", but was I truly a Christ Follower. Was I putting Christ in charge of all things? My marriage, my relationships, my children? NO! And it Showed. I've been happy-ish. I'm still really good at pretending, faking a smile, playing happy, but anyone can do that. What about Joy, true Joy, I didn't have it, but I wanted it!! My days were still a battle. Everyday I wake up, I can fake my way through the day, or give in to the depression, but what about Joy. What about waking up with a desire to do everything in your day for the Glory of God, with Love and Joy, that's what I wanted. I'm still fighting the Anger and Depression though. Thanks to the Biblical preaching and encouragement I receive at my new church, I'm getting stronger, not physically, but spiritually. I'm also learning to Love Me! More importantly though I'm learning to truly Love God, to Know Him, to Trust Him, to be Vulnerable in Him, to be Weak and Broken and trust that he can rebuild me into something so much more than I can understand. 
Does that mean I'm all better. Heck NO! Just yesterday, I spent the day on the couch with no desire to move, while my amazing children asked me to play, my depression held me there, telling me there was no point in getting up. But today was a new day, and I chose Joy, I chose a Movie with the kids and then attended our evening Church Service. Tomorrow I hope to choose to put God first and to grow in him, and everyday after.

If you are in Jacksonville and looking for a Great Church to attend, join me at Eleven22. If you are not local, you can listen to the sermons online.

Pink is My Favorite Color

Okay. Pink actually isn't my favorite color, it's Orange, but pink has been creeping into our lives a lot more ever since we found out 7 months ago that Harp4 was going to be a girl. I know, I know, this post is long over due. I'm sorry, but I've been so busy crafting and planning for, and finally meeting my little Naomi, that getting online and blogging has been the furthest from my mind.
So let's talk about Naomi!!! Man do I love that baby!!! Most of you may remember our facebook pregnancy announcement.

We waited to make the announcement until we knew what we were having, to help ward off some of the negative comments. James and I were very excited. I think James was even more excited than me that we were having a girl. I got started crafting and James got to painting.

We were scheduled to get to the hospital at 5:00am on Friday September, 20th. At around 2:00 I started having pretty regular contractions so I decided to get up and take a shower and go ahead and get ready. I got James up around 4:00am and we ahead off to the hospital.

For some reason I was even more nervous about this csection than the last one. Maybe last time I was naive and this time I knew what to expect. Also this time I didn't have a doctor that I was in love with. My doctor, Doctor Price, whom I absolutely loved and trusted 100%, announced 3 months before my due date that she would be moving to a different state. I was very sad, but life goes on, and as long as Naomi arrived safely, I would be happy. So, we got to the hospital and got all set up and off to the OR we went. Everyone was super nice and really helped keep me calm. There was a point where they were having a hard time getting her out because she was breech. She was definitely giving the doctor a run for his money and a workout. They were pulling and pushing and tugging on her and me. Finally she came out looking all cute and gross at the same time.

Once we get to our room, our nurse asks what our new baby's name is. Um, we haven't decided yet. We had spent the night before seriously talking about all different names and still hadn't decided on anything. I really wanted James to choose her name since I had chosen all the boys names. Naomi Arya was my original choice but I also liked the idea of using my middle name which was also my Grandmother's name. So James choose Naomi Lorene Harper and I loved it and thought it fit our baby girl very well. We spent the next few days in the hospital and finally got to come home to start our new Chapter with our baby girl. Naomi fits into our family like she's always been there. The boys are obsessed with her, she loves her daddy, and I never knew I could love a baby girl as much as I do.

The past 4 months have flown by and I wouldn't change a single thing about our lives at the moment. We've had some other big changes in the past few months so stay tuned for more. 
Love you all and thanks for reading.
                                 Danielle

Insomnia

Today is day 3 of waking up at 3:00am and not being able to go back to sleep so I figured it was time to blog. I forgot how terrible my sleeping gets during the last couple months of my pregnancies. I figure it's my bodies way of getting me ready for the sleepless nights when Harp4 arrives.

Speaking of Harp4... We've had almost everyone ask what Harp4's name is. We have not decided on a name and have unofficially decided to wait until she's born to choose her name. There is a list of possible names and I know once we see her face then we'll be able to decide which one is right for her.

So, when is Harp4 arriving you may ask. Well, we're not telling, We have requested our C-section date and we are waiting for a call back to confirm the date is available but we want to keep the element of surprise in her arrival. I'm also kinda hoping for the whole going into labor on my own thing. The closest I've come to going into labor is when we went in to be induced with Jacob and I was already 4 cm dilated and contracting regularly. I have a feeling with all the walking and running I do chasing after these crazy boys I could go into labor on my own but we shall see. Thankfully my boys are awesome and Jeremiah and I can usually squeeze in a nap most days while Austin and Jacob lay in bed with us and watch a movie.

On another note: We have 2 baby showers scheduled for us. One is here in Tallahassee on August 10th and the other is in Jacksonville on August 24th. I love baby showers!! Not just showers for me, but any baby shower. I love seeing all the little clothes and cute blankets and toys and bottles and pacifiers. I also love the celebration of it all and seeing people's common excitement for a little person they haven't met yet. I do get nervous at my own baby shower though. I just don't really enjoy being the center of attention in big crowds so sitting in the center of the room while everyone watches me open gifts can be a little nerve-racking. I also have a hard time remembering people's names and feel bad if I don't immediately know who it is giving the gift. This usually happens with the church baby shower because some of the ladies that show up are ones that I don't get a chance to talk with on a regular basis. But I enjoy seeing and hanging out with people that I normally don't get spend time with in the hustle and bustle of rounding the kids up after church.

I've been busy organizing and trying to get Harp4's room cleaned out. My Dad fixed and painted our changing table and I'm picking that up tomorrow, or today I guess. We still need to paint the bedroom and the dresser. I also have lots of sewing projects to work on as soon as my fabric arrives this week. I'm so glad I waited to place my fabric order because almost all of it went on sale last week and I was able to get an extra yard of fabric and still have my total $10 less than what I had originally calculated. Yay for Sales!!! I can't wait to show you guys all the things I hope to create for Harp4. Time seems to be going so fast though so I hope I'm able to get all my projects done. We have a little over 2 months left til our actual due date so I know if I can complete one project a week we will be good to go. The projects at the top of my list to complete first are the crib bumpers, diaper bag, recovering the swing and curtains. After that I hope to do the crib skirt, a cover for the carseat and some decorations though out the room. Anyone who wants to come help do some painting is more than welcome. I'm probably swinging into Home Depot today to grab the paint and will hopefully have Harp4's room completely cleaned out by the weekend.

By the way, I am So excited to meet Harp4!!!!!

That's it for now. Stay tuned for pics of projects as I get them completed.

It's About Time

Hello friends,

So, after a year and a half, James and I finally decided to get internet. Woohoo. I figured it's time to start blogging again. I have a ton of projects I'm going to be working on for the babies room and I hope to post lots of before and after photos of her room. I also want to keep everyone updated on the happenings of my crazy boys and our homeschooling adventures in the months to come.

This is a really short post but you gotta start somewhere right!

New House

This is going to be a short post for 2 reasons. Reason 1; I'm typing this on Blairs iPad. Reason2; it's nap time. So I don't have much time and I'm not fast at typing on this thing.

My main reason for writing this is my bubbling excitement for our up coming move. As most of you know James and I have been living in a tiny little 2 bedroom with our 3 boys for a little over a year now. Now the time has come for us to upgrade. Enter our friends Michael and Rebecca who have decided to build themselves a new house and need someone to move into their 3 bedroom house in a beautiful neighborhood. We a so blessed and grateful that they thought of us. They started the process of building their house last February and through lots of delays and hard work, they got the go-ahead yesterday to start moving out of their old house and into their new one. We are super excited for them and even more excited to be moving into our first real home. Up until now we have felt like we were always just living in a place til we were able to get into the house we really wanted. Although we have plans to move a little more to the country and possibly build our own house one day, this new house is going to be the house before that.
In approximately 2 weeks we will be moving into our new house and I can't thank God enough for really teaching me patience through all of this waiting. In a couple months we will be having a house warming party (my first ever), and that is exciting too. So I look forward to having all of our friends over to show them our new Home!
Bonus perk of the new house is we get Jeremiah out of our room I'm a little sad about this but it will be so nice. Hand I will also have my own sewing area. Woohoo!!!!!!!!

Love you guys and God Bless!
Danielle

Making a Difference

There are alot of things that I really love about being married, but one of my favorite things is being able to stay up super late with my best friend talk about our goals and dreams in life. This was much easier for us before kids, but I feel it is much more important now that we have kids. Last night James came home with alot on his mind and really wanted to talk. I had been talking all day to toddlers and babies and really would have preferred to just sit on the coach in a comatose state until I started to dose off, then go to bed. After some prodding James was able to get me to turn off the computer and Tv and pay attention to him, and I'm glad I did.


One of the things James and I discussed last night was the fact that we both want to make sure we are not living a Worldly mediocre life. I don't want to get to an old age and realize I just coasted thru life and didn't make a difference. I try to make sure that I am not focusing too much on material possessions and the things the world says we need so that others will know we are successful. I would really love to get to a point where we own our own home and are completely debt free so that we can use our time and our income to make a difference for others and for God! Making a difference for God's Kingdom is what I want out of my life. If that means being a stay at home mom for the next 18 years and focus on raising up Godly men who also desire to grow God's Kingdom, then that is what I'll do. If God calls us to move our family to a different country, then I want to be just as trusting of God to do that!


I think one of the hardest things about this stage with my kids is that I feel like it's just about getting thru the day sometimes. Between staggered naps and meals and snacks every hour it seems, sometimes it's hard to just sit with them and remember to teach them about God and his desires for our life. I know that this is the age that their minds are little sponges just searching for information to fill it up and I want to make sure that I'm filling it with God's word.

For now I do believe I am where I'm supposed to be. I will continue to keep an open heart and an open mind to know what God has for us. I am forever grateful that he has given me this mission with these three amazing boys